This trend seems to be catching on in airlines, grocery stores and hotels as well, and may probably be enforced in movie theaters. Is this trend justified, or is this just intolerance gone too far? Does this truly make or break an evening out, or is this subtle discrimination cloaked in a veil of one's fundamental rights?
One might argue that the businesses don't want to be involved in any situation that may result from a child being a nuisance and someone who might decide to take matters into their own hands. Case in point: two years ago, 61 year old Roger Stephens allegedly slapped a crying child at a Walmart store. Stephens claims that he only touched the two year old on her face and that the media and law enforcement has blown his actions way out of proportion. Could you possibly blame Walmart for not wanting to be culpable in this situation? What could they have possibly done to avoid this happening? By the way, it may be important to note that Stephens had no children. Neither does Vuick, owner of McDains. As a matter of fact, the brat ban is being blamed on childless adults with money to spend.
Being a childless adult myself, I don't think it's fair to paint all of us as crotchety and intolerant, just as I don't think it's fair to classify all children as brats. I have been subject to a group of teenagers at the table next to me talking unacceptably loudly, their sentences peppered with swear words. I am no prude, but if the f-bomb is being dropped at the rate of ten times per second, not to mention other swear words which were much more offensive to me, the discomfort I feel from a wailing child pales in comparison. Nobody seemed to want to take any action in this situation, despite complaints to management.
So, how does one come to a resolution that is fair to everyone? Here's what I think.
To the people who frequent restaurants, fly in airplanes, stay in hotels and go to movies, lighten up. Children need to go to these places. They need to learn how to behave in different social situations so they grow up to be productive members of society. If they are cocooned in children-only environments, it will be detrimental to their emotional growth. Face it, you were't always the perfect child. I know I wasn't. If a child is truly misbehaving and affecting you, complain to the management. If they don't do anything about it, get up and leave. You do deserve to have a great evening and it will make the management think twice about not doing anything to address unruly behavior. If you are flying in a plane, think of the discomfort you feel because of cabin pressure, high frequency sounds or a churning in your stomach. Now imagine that discomfort multiplied by a hundred. That's how a child feels. Can you blame them for crying?
To the parents of children, control your young ones. While many of the childless among us don't realize what it takes to raise a child, some of us truly understand that no matter how good of a parent you are, children are unpredictable. Which means they will misbehave in public, most of the time when you least expect them to. The best of them will scream, cry, whine, and do whatever it takes to get their way. Others will get up from their table and run around a restaurant. When they do any of this, don't turn a blind eye and pretend not to hear them. Do something about it. Take them outside, discipline them, do whatever you need to. Please don't subject the rest of us to your child when you know they are misbehaving. Whatever you decide to do, just make sure that you don't yell louder than your child. That just makes it worse for us.
To the owners of these establishments, take a stand. Most places have a sign that says, "We reserve the right to refuse service to anyone." Use those rights the way they were intended. Put up a sign next to it that clearly spells out unacceptable behavior in your establishment. A bar does not serve liquor to a person who seems even slightly inebriated. Similarly, it can very easily be determined which children are being a nuisance to the rest of the patrons in a restaurant, and if nothing is being done about it by the parents, something can be done about it by you. It doesn't have to be limited to children either. If ANYONE is being generally obnoxious and ruining other peoples' evening, they can be asked to leave. You just need to decide to do something about it. Be honest - do you really want to encourage bad behavior at the risk of losing business? Trust me when I say that in the long run, you will benefit from taking a stand.
I think if all of us decide to accommodate one another just a little bit, there would be no need for extreme trends like the Brat Ban.
What do you think?
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